Purplemoon Monthly Musings

Purplemoon Monthly Musings – May -Reflecting on reflection

By Jenny Bowers on

Purplemoon Monthly Musing

Posted 30th April 2025

Reflecting on Reflective Practise- a Purplemoon Monthly Musing

Welcome to Purplemoon Monthly Musings.

On the final Wednesday of every month Jenny will be posting out about a theme that has been appearing in her work, or her life, across all sectors. It could be a topic that particularly resonates with you, or it might be a new concept or idea to you. Either way the aim is to give voice to some thoughts, ponder some questions and explore what this might mean to us as individuals and as a community. Jenny will always aim to credit original sources as she explores the musings title and will welcome your comments and contributions to keep the musing going! This blog is also published on LinkedIn. Follow Jenny here.

I’m diving into a topic close to my heart—reflection.
But is reflection always a good thing?

You might assume that, as a supervisor and coach, I’m automatically pro-reflection. The short answer, as my short answers often go, is: it depends.

So, what does it depend on?

  • When reflection is happening
  • Where it’s taking place
  • How it’s being done
  • What the goal of the reflection is
  • Which method or “vehicle” is being used
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The Lens we use matters

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When I am in session with clients, I often notice a tendency to reflect utilising a critical lens. They are analysing what went wrong, what they “should have” done, and how to avoid mistakes in the future. While this can be useful, it often leads to rumination and self-criticism.

Instead, I invite clients to try a self-compassionate lens. What were the positives, even in a difficult situation? Can we accept that the outcome was shaped by context and circumstances? Can we consider what the emotions and energy were in that space, and from that accept how the outcome occurred? From there, we can explore what might be possible next time, and how to bring that about. This shift is often empowering.

Timings matter

Now let’s consider when reflection occurs. I find it interesting that for many people in situations that pose challenge or conflict the desire is to only have a reflection immediately after. For example, in a school where a child has become very dysregulated and the situation has spiralled into someone becoming hurt. Or in a role where a member of the community has become extremely abusive because they feel they are not being treated the way they should be treated.

 A debrief and check in is vital, in the immediacy of the incident, to ensure that everyone knows they are safe and if there is any key learning or follow up (possibly with other agencies or organisations) that needs to be put in place straight away. However, that is one type of reflection and is very narrow in focus. Who is leading that debrief/check in needs to be considered, are they someone with no emotional impact from the situation? Or if they were involved, what lens are they using, and what emotions and thoughts are they bringing into the space?

Productive and beneficial reflection will occur if there is time between this debrief and the reflection. Maybe 3-5 days. This reflection can be held in a group or with individuals and can indeed be done by a lone individual for themselves. For this reflection to be productive it is not a rerun of the debrief, it is considering what came out of the debrief, and has any thinking evolved? Have thoughts and feelings changed? Are there now things that can be explored about what preceded the situation, what followed the situation, as well as the situation itself? As time has given distance from it, there is the potential for greater depth to the reflection. Were there any successful strategies, any helpful help? Were the actions that came out of the debrief followed up? successful? Do different actions need to occur? Reflecting on reflection is deeply powerful when framed well.

Reflection as a regular practise, that takes practice

Reflection doesn’t need to be reserved for difficult moments. At the end of the week, reflecting on what you thought on Monday about Monday may give you something to consider about how you enter the next week, or give you a nudge to check in with someone or about something. It might help you understand why Tuesday and Wednesday went the way they did!. Going back over notes you made at a meeting or an event a month later, or even a year later, can spark a change in thinking for today and tomorrow.

Reflecting isnt something you can just do, for it to be productive and beneficial you need to give it time and energy. You need to learn what methodology is best for you, and you need to understand why it is occurring in the first place.

I am an advocate for the supervision and/or coaching space to enable and empower reflective thinking, but I am also aware this is not the only way to do it. Indeed, it is not the only place I utilise reflective thought. I do love a good walk, allowing  reflective thinking to germinate and grow out of my subconscious as I do so, then putting in under an imaginary microscope and considering what it might mean for me, and for those I work with.

For my journaling advocates out there, let me ask you this, do you go back and reflect on what is written? How many times and when? What do you do with these reflections? For the readers of many non-fiction books, how do you reflect on what you have read, when and how?

Let’s Reflect Together

So, will you now reflect on your way of reflecting?
I’d love to hear your thoughts. If you’d like to explore this further, let’s have a reflective conversation.

Purplemoon Monthly Musings – April – Never Enough Time

By Jenny Bowers on

Purplemoon Monthly Musing

Posted 30th April 2025

There's never enough time!- an Purplemoon Monthly Musing

Welcome to Purplemoon Monthly Musings.

On the final Wednesday of every month Jenny will be posting out about a theme that has been appearing in her work, or her life, across all sectors. It could be a topic that particularly resonates with you, or it might be a new concept or idea to you. Either way the aim is to give voice to some thoughts, ponder some questions and explore what this might mean to us as individuals and as a community. Jenny will always aim to credit original sources as she explores the musings title and will welcome your comments and contributions to keep the musing going! This blog is also published on LinkedIn. Follow Jenny here.

Have you ever said 'there isn't enough time, or that 'there is no time for 'it'?'

these phrases are particularly used when it comes to wellbeing/self care/fun activities.  I know that it is a phrase that I have used myself, and it is still present as a thought that can pop up regularly. When I hear this phrase muttered there are two responses that I usually utilise (the first usually when it is a specific task or activity, the second when it is a generalised response):

  1. Not enough time to complete it? Start it? Or do it to the standard you want to?
  2. Is it really a time issue or a workload, expectation, overwhelmed issue?

The reality that most human beings grapple with is that time is finite. It just is rigid and relentless in its passing. Time is not something we can change. However, what I have come to realise, and what I give space to others to explore is, we can change our relationship with time. So can we utilise it better?

The key to consider is; are we are using time ‘management’ as an excuse to not do things. Or do we see it as a more acceptable reason to give than ”I am overwhelmed” or ”I don’t know where/how to start.”

Queen Mañana

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I am a queen of procrastination, to the point that my parents would often use ‘mañana’ as a nickname for me. What I realised is that I didn’t like starting anything unless I knew I had time to complete it. So not starting the task meant that that I could use my time (today) for something else and that task would be done in the future. Of course it isn’t the best strategy to have, especially when you are working and have deadlines and people counting on you to get things done so they can do their work! So now I consider larger tasks as sequences of mini tasks and experience success of the completion of stages, and plan through what is done today, by the end of the week, and so on. This may mean that different projects, reports, plans are all at different stages, and many are unfinished, but they are being done!

 

Measuring Time

Time is also hard for humans to measure, so although we understand that a minute is 60 seconds, and always will be 60 seconds, we experience time in different ways depending on what we are doing. With the pull of the internet and the ability to go down virtual rabbit holes and explore so many tangents and possibilities we can lose track of time. We have so much ‘research’ and ‘evidence’ and ‘experiences’ at our fingertips it has become so hard to be disciplined in what data or evidence to use as so many tangents can be fascinating time hoovers. So before you know it the afternoon is gone! We also sometime have unrealistic expectation of what we can achieve in 10 minutes, 30 minutes etc. I am sure that everyone has experienced saying ‘give me 5 minutes’ to a family member or colleague. Or ‘Yep, I can do that, it’ll only take me 30 minutes’.

The reality is sometimes it really will take longer! This might be because you want to operate at a very high (perfectionist) standard. sometimes it is because you are being constantly distracted by others (or yourself) or sometimes it is because it is more complicated/time consuming that you thought.

We also can get caught in a loop. Sometimes we think something is done, but we get a query, or a response. Or in completing one activity (say a meeting) more work/actions are created and this then all takes time, so is the task completed or not? This is where overwhelm can really kick in; the thought of ‘there’s just not enough time.’

So What Can You Do?

  • Know which tasks need your undivided attention, and potentially which need high energy levels, and consider first when in the day/week you are going to do them (and plan it in) and also consider where you are going to do them. – where is interesting, as it also might me where in the day – so if you are in a shared office, when will you be there on your own? Or do you need to take yourself elsewhere?
  • Be prepared in busy seasons to spend less time on making reports/articles look pretty! Accept that good enough is good enough- and know what this is! Does what you have done do the minimum requirements? If it does, then it is complete, move on. This is about the wise use of time.
  • Be realistic, use the knowledge you have gained from experience – if you have a meeting and you know there will be actions for you/follow up, then plan these in to your time. Block out time pre and post meeting for prep and follow up. Do this for all meetings. Some will require less- this is where your experience counts. If you have a task to complete that requires research, or talking to people or gathering evidence, block this out too! Task prep into the plan first, and then task doing.
  • Even when we are experienced, we can still be a novice, and so some tasks need learning, so they will take longer! Remember that the first time of doing, more time will be needed. You will get quicker as you get experienced! (I will be returning to novice/expert a few times in the monthly musings, it resonates in so many places).

 

I appreciate this musing may be a rabbit hole that you have scurried down, but hopefully it has been a worthwhile use of your time! I will now conclude the musing, so you can utilise your next unit of time to reflect and muse yourself. Is there anything you will consider, try out or do differently now?

Purplemoon Monthly Musings – an introduction

By Jenny Bowers on

Purplemoon Monthly Musing

Posted 26th March 2025

What is in a name? - an introduction to the monthly musings

What the name is, is two words that are connected to me:

Welcome to Purplemoon Monthly Musings.

On the final Wednesday of every month Jenny will be posting out about a theme that has been appearing in her work, or her life, across all sectors. It could be a topic that particularly resonates with you, or it might be a new concept or idea to you. Either way the aim is to give voice to some thoughts, ponder some questions and explore what this might mean to us as individuals and as a community. I will always aim to credit original sources as I explore the musings title and will welcome your comments and contributions to keep the musing going! This blog is also published on LinkedIn. Follow Jenny here.

As part of this introduction Jenny thought it would be good to answer a question she is frequently asked ‘why purplemoon?’

 

When I made the decision to set up a company to deliver supervision and coaching, and to support wellbeing in individuals and organisations, I knew that I wanted a company who’s name was not my own. As a supervisor and as a coach it is important that you are holding the space for others and operating without your Ego being dominant in the room. It is a space for others, not me, so the company is not my name.

Purple, as it is my favourite colour. It is bold, bright and, to me, joyful, it can also be complimentary and subtle. This is what I want the company to bring to the spaces it works in.

Moon, as the moon holds particular meaning for me. The moon is a constant presence, it moves around the earth and has importance for the earths routine and flow, without being dominant, flashy or demanding. The view we have of it as it moves around changes, reminding us that not everything is seen all at once all the time. And crucially, when I was travelling (before mobile phones enabled instant connectivity) I knew that the moon I saw was the moon that my family and friends saw, no matter where in the world I was, or where they were, so we were always connected. I still look to the moon and smile, thinking of all the people I have known and shared ‘looking at the moon’ with.

Interestingly what causes most confusion is that I made a compound word!

This is because I love language and creativity, and like making words. The two words together is what this company is!

Supervision and Coaching Ltd, was added, after some deliberation around the question posed to me by others. ‘will people know what you do?’ so in full the company is Purplemoon Supervision and Coaching Ltd, but I am delighted that most people do get what Purplemoon is about.

You can follow Purplemoon Supervision and Coaching on LinkedIn too, click here

And why call this series of prose ‘Purplemoon monthly musings?’ Because I love alliteration!
What names matter to you, and how did they come about? Let me know!